What Do I Do With Sexual Arousal When I Can’t Act On It Sexually?
Let’s be honest.
Sexual arousal isn’t just a thing that happens.
It’s a thing that takes over.
And when it hits — especially when you’re not in a place to act on it (you’re single, celibate, or committed to purity) — the question becomes:
What am I supposed to do with all of this energy?
Ignore it?
Fight it?
Try to pray it away?
Let’s get real.
That’s not working for most men.
The Real Problem Isn’t the Arousal
Sexual energy is not a sin.
It’s not shameful.
It’s not something to get rid of.
It’s power.
God-given, life-giving, soul-moving power.
The problem isn’t the arousal — it’s what you’ve trained your brain to do with it.
For most of us, arousal = action:
Seek release
Seek escape
Seek porn, masturbation, or “just one more scroll”
We’ve built a neural highway between arousal and escape.
But freedom doesn’t come from suppressing your sexual energy.
It comes from redirecting it.
Here’s the Truth:
Arousal is a spark. You get to decide what it powers.
When you feel aroused and can’t act on it sexually, you’re not stuck.
You’re standing at a fork in the road.
Option 1: Use that energy to feed an old pattern.
Option 2: Channel it into something new — something creative, embodied, and life-giving.
3 Things You Can Do With Arousal (When Sex Isn’t an Option)
1. Redirect it into your body.
Sexual energy is physical.
So bring it into your body instead of trying to numb it.
Try this:
Go for a walk or lift something heavy
Do slow, controlled breathwork
Do pushups while praying Psalm 63:1 — “My body longs for you…”
This tells your nervous system:
“I don’t have to discharge this — I can contain it. I can use it.”
You’re converting craving into embodied strength.
2. Use it as a signal to connect.
Sexual longing often masks emotional longing.
You’re not just craving release — you’re craving connection.
So reach out:
Call a brother and talk vulnerably
Hug your spouse or your kids
Make eye contact with someone you love
Journal a prayer of honest longing before God
Every time you respond to arousal with relationship instead of escape, you rewire your brain.
You’re building new neural pathways:
Arousal → Connection
Longing → Presence
Energy → Intimacy
3. Fuel your purpose with it.
Sexual energy is creative energy.
God didn’t just give it to us to make babies — He gave it to awaken purpose.
Let it drive you to:
Build something meaningful
Serve someone sacrificially
Focus on a mission that matters
Finish a project you’ve been avoiding
Redirected arousal is like gasoline — it’ll power whatever engine you give it.
So give it an engine that changes the world.
A Final Word: Don’t Fight It. Train It.
Trying to “resist” arousal doesn’t work.
But retraining how your body responds to it? That’s the path to freedom.
At Freedom Groups, we help men do exactly that.
We don’t shame your arousal.
We show you how to master it —
So it becomes a force for love, creativity, intimacy, and God’s mission in your life.
You’re Not Broken. You’re Becoming Powerful.
Every time you feel aroused and don’t cave —
You’re not failing.
You’re forging new strength.
And when you redirect that energy toward presence, purpose, and power —
You become the kind of man who doesn’t run from temptation.
You rise inside it.
If you want practical training, real brotherhood, and spiritual strength to live this out…
We’ll help you turn arousal into fuel for the man you’re becoming.
—
Joe Masek
Founder, The Freedom Group
Helping men become whole, rooted, and free.